What's up, Beautiful?
So, there was no puck today. Seems like FOREVER since that's happened, eh? We've (...I've) just been watching puck steady for about 6 weeks now, and it's nice to give it a rest, I gotta say.
FILMED ISSUE ALERT!!!: Seeds have been planted, stay tuned. I have a director on call for it to be shot this Saturday, so hopefully it'll be up that same day, or if not, before the Canucks game. He's a big fucking deal of a director, too. Hopefully he sticks to my genius/my script.
Of course, my mind did veer off into Hockeyland today while I was driving up in the mountains in the pouring rain. I thought of a couple little tidbits to throw your way. If Vancouver ends up playing Detroit, imagine where Kesler's intensity level will be? If you thought it couldn't get any higher than its been, well try throwing the budding legend into his hometown for the biggest series of his career. I can't even imagine it, seriously. It's too hard.
Also, I just wanna put this out in cyberspace, too. Canucks centreman/faceoff artist/emotional leader/inspiration Manny Malhotra skated today. He wore a full cage (I'd call him a pussy if not for the severity of his injury, I think he would've lost his eye had he not had the best doctors in the world working on him), and just did some really low-energy stuff. But I'm gonna go on record to say, don't be surprised if you see Mr. Manny if we get to the Big Dance. I thought that after he had his surgery, and now I'm thinking it more seriously. Not because I have any inside sources or anything (the team is keeping it really hush-hush), but with all the privacy measures teams take on injuries and everything, just don't be surprised if he's rehabbing VERY quickly. Imagine that. Like Kes in Detroit, too hard to imagine, what that'd feel like watching that. WOW.
SO while I was driving, like myself, radio sportscasters didn't have much to talk about today either. They did, however, bring up a topic that is pretty interesting to talk about...
New York Rangers forward Sean Avery did a PSA about same-sex marriage in New York state. Supporting it. Cool.
A sports agent and a sportscaster went public and openly said they weren't cool with it, and it's "wrong".
Now, before I would've just spewed those 2 dudes blood all over the place, called them fucking bigots and told them that I hope they burn in "hell" along with their stupid religious beliefs.
But, I suppose I have just learned to have a little faith in humanity now as I get a bit older. I totally disagree with these two morons, and think that 2 people should be able to love each other regardless of any cultural boundary, because love makes the world go round and the more the better. Word? uh huh, I thought so. What else are we living for??
These people will come around. They'll get it. maybe not THEM specifically, but eventually, WE'LL get it. you know? It won't be an issue. Slowly but surely, we're chugging along.
So the sportscasters I was listening to (not the morons) are talking about how the sports world is basically the last barrier to be broken for homosexuality to be accepted in the public eye. Entertainer and politicians are coming out, and it seems to go over pretty well (i'm sure there are exceptions, yes...). But never in the sports world has an ACTIVE professional athlete playing one of the "major" sports came out of the closet. And don't kid yourself, People. No WAY there's all those athletes, and ALL of them are as into "smashing box" as they say they are in the lockerroom with the boys. Logic just wouldn't allow it.
All I'm gonna say is, just refer to the picture above. WE used to think, in the century we were all born in for fuck sakes, that a black man shouldn't be able to play sports with a white man. Couldn't happen. Impossible. Well, that's the general impression about an openly gay person playing a pro team sport now. Couldn't happen, it'd be too hard. Too much backdraft. Too much abuse. Too much bad publicity. Too much image-tarnishing.
It's the same old story, it's the Jackie Robinson story, with a twist. We keep our bigotry and our hate out of the universe as much as possible, and someone will be brave enough. Imagine if Jackie Robinson wasn't brave enough to come out and play with the white guys? No Canadian would've seen Joe Carter "touch 'em all". We wouldn't know what Michael Jordan's tongue looks like. We could never call Corey Perry "the fridge" because we wouldn't have a reference point.
"A life is not important except in the impact it has on others' lives". That's what Jackie Robinson believed. That's what he said, actually.
Someone'll do it. They'll come out. It'll make big news, and they'll be a hero. And then, as time goes on, it won't be an issue anymore. Then WE'll find something else to be opposed to that doesn't make sense, and WE'll find a way to break that barrier down, too. WE're dumb and WE're genius, brave and cowardly, WE're scared at first, but WE learn to accept and learn to love. WE're human.
Go Canucks, muthafuckaz!
xosmlxo
xosmlxo
Wednesday, 11 May 2011
Tuesday, 10 May 2011
ANYTHINGS POSSSSSIBLE!
Leyzer Nation,
That's right. Anything's possible. If Kid Rock can not only bang Pam Anderson, but marry her, then yes, Anything's possible. Ya, she's got a bad reputation amongst all the celebrity-stalking freaks out there, but fuck it. She's a fox. Still, at like age 60 or however old she is. I'd hit it.
I'm sure the "ugliest man in music history" also believes in his beloved Red Wings, along with his ability to cram pimpage.
HOW IS DETROIT DOING THIS?! No one comes back from 0-3. It never happens! It's supposed to be one of those things that you always remember: where you were, who you were with, who you were screwing at the time, and you just store it up in your memory chamber and only bust it out when you're sitting around with the boys talking about how awesome your life used to be compared to how monotonous, fat and gray it is now. It's supposed to be a sports fans "The day Lennon was shot" or "The day Armstrong landed on the moon" (fuck off, conspiracy theorists, I fucking hate you all. Just believe for once in your life.) day. Now it's happened thrice in twice years. It's, well, I guess I'll use the word dramatic. It makes for good TV and sports boners worldwide.
The Red Wings just refuse to be called the Dead Things. It's amazing. They get behind in the 3rd period, and it's as if they just decide to relieve their fans of disappointment at the drop of a hat. Boom. Boom. Boom. Game over. The scoring comes from all over the place, but the meat and potatoes of their lineup are just playing like they want the cup as much as Ryan Kesler.
They deserved to win that game from puckdrop, and Niemi deserved a better fate. I just can't see Detroit losing this game 7. Just when you think they're too old, that their young depth guys aren't gonna be the depth guys the Draper's, Maltby's, the McCarty's, they just stay alive, baby. They're a model of consistency and success, and have hoisted the mug more times than a college kid at Oktoberfest after his high-school sweetheart left him for her T.A., but this would be HUGE for that franchise. just fucking HUGE.
On a personal level, I don't care whether Detroit or San Jose wins. Bring that shit ON! I'm confident that this break will do nothing but benefit the Canucks. We'll be as strong as ever. As strong as Thor. As strong as a pissed off kid with down syndrome. As strong as a whiskey shit. As strong as Meryl Streep.
The Canucks are gonna be licking their chops just waiting for their next opponent. They'll be prepared, have had watched a TONNE of video, practised a TONNE, rested a TONNE, and felt all the love in the city a TONNE. They'll be jacked up. Ready to rock. Baweetabawwwdadangdadangdiggydiggy. Don't think they won't be able to dial up the intensity, come Sunday, it's on.
And if you're wondering how teams can drop out of the playoffs so quickly, you can avoid looking at what's in the players heart and go straight to the medical records. As many as 7 guys on the Flyers need to have surgery this summer. Goes to show how much guys want it. They'll play through broken bones, (almost typed "boners" there, haha), through torn muscles (almost typed "titties" there, haha), and they'll play through their minds and their bodies telling them to stop. The heart is there, or they wouldn't be in the playoffs in the first place.
On a sidenote, it's been asked numerous times if I've found a "playoff girlfriend" yet. Well, we're halfway done the playoffs, and still no bites. But not for lack of effort or anything, I'm sure my fans are out there, finding the best looking broads in Vancouver for me. The effort is appreciated. But, I'm gonna tell you why this mission has been unsuccessful. I went to London Drugs today to get a passport photo done. I look like a wannabe terrorist with this beard. I'm thinking of shaving it (keep in mind, Daniel Sedin and Roberto Luongo have shaved theirs, and Daniel even scored last game, I KNOW I KNOW, hard to believe after my constant Sedin-bitching). But honestly, it looks like a Greek dude glued his pubes to my neck, and a 12 year old adolsecent glued his to my upperlip. I think it's gotta go, it's ruining my work-of-artesque face, and turning it into a kindergarten teachers fingerpainting. I'm doing the world a disservice by having this beard. I hate to be talking about it so much, but it's what's popping into my mind right now, so that's what I'm saying.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go scribble "SL + RK = TLF on a piece of paper until there is nothing but ink showing.
xosmlxo
That's right. Anything's possible. If Kid Rock can not only bang Pam Anderson, but marry her, then yes, Anything's possible. Ya, she's got a bad reputation amongst all the celebrity-stalking freaks out there, but fuck it. She's a fox. Still, at like age 60 or however old she is. I'd hit it.
I'm sure the "ugliest man in music history" also believes in his beloved Red Wings, along with his ability to cram pimpage.
HOW IS DETROIT DOING THIS?! No one comes back from 0-3. It never happens! It's supposed to be one of those things that you always remember: where you were, who you were with, who you were screwing at the time, and you just store it up in your memory chamber and only bust it out when you're sitting around with the boys talking about how awesome your life used to be compared to how monotonous, fat and gray it is now. It's supposed to be a sports fans "The day Lennon was shot" or "The day Armstrong landed on the moon" (fuck off, conspiracy theorists, I fucking hate you all. Just believe for once in your life.) day. Now it's happened thrice in twice years. It's, well, I guess I'll use the word dramatic. It makes for good TV and sports boners worldwide.
The Red Wings just refuse to be called the Dead Things. It's amazing. They get behind in the 3rd period, and it's as if they just decide to relieve their fans of disappointment at the drop of a hat. Boom. Boom. Boom. Game over. The scoring comes from all over the place, but the meat and potatoes of their lineup are just playing like they want the cup as much as Ryan Kesler.
They deserved to win that game from puckdrop, and Niemi deserved a better fate. I just can't see Detroit losing this game 7. Just when you think they're too old, that their young depth guys aren't gonna be the depth guys the Draper's, Maltby's, the McCarty's, they just stay alive, baby. They're a model of consistency and success, and have hoisted the mug more times than a college kid at Oktoberfest after his high-school sweetheart left him for her T.A., but this would be HUGE for that franchise. just fucking HUGE.
On a personal level, I don't care whether Detroit or San Jose wins. Bring that shit ON! I'm confident that this break will do nothing but benefit the Canucks. We'll be as strong as ever. As strong as Thor. As strong as a pissed off kid with down syndrome. As strong as a whiskey shit. As strong as Meryl Streep.
The Canucks are gonna be licking their chops just waiting for their next opponent. They'll be prepared, have had watched a TONNE of video, practised a TONNE, rested a TONNE, and felt all the love in the city a TONNE. They'll be jacked up. Ready to rock. Baweetabawwwdadangdadangdiggydiggy. Don't think they won't be able to dial up the intensity, come Sunday, it's on.
And if you're wondering how teams can drop out of the playoffs so quickly, you can avoid looking at what's in the players heart and go straight to the medical records. As many as 7 guys on the Flyers need to have surgery this summer. Goes to show how much guys want it. They'll play through broken bones, (almost typed "boners" there, haha), through torn muscles (almost typed "titties" there, haha), and they'll play through their minds and their bodies telling them to stop. The heart is there, or they wouldn't be in the playoffs in the first place.
On a sidenote, it's been asked numerous times if I've found a "playoff girlfriend" yet. Well, we're halfway done the playoffs, and still no bites. But not for lack of effort or anything, I'm sure my fans are out there, finding the best looking broads in Vancouver for me. The effort is appreciated. But, I'm gonna tell you why this mission has been unsuccessful. I went to London Drugs today to get a passport photo done. I look like a wannabe terrorist with this beard. I'm thinking of shaving it (keep in mind, Daniel Sedin and Roberto Luongo have shaved theirs, and Daniel even scored last game, I KNOW I KNOW, hard to believe after my constant Sedin-bitching). But honestly, it looks like a Greek dude glued his pubes to my neck, and a 12 year old adolsecent glued his to my upperlip. I think it's gotta go, it's ruining my work-of-artesque face, and turning it into a kindergarten teachers fingerpainting. I'm doing the world a disservice by having this beard. I hate to be talking about it so much, but it's what's popping into my mind right now, so that's what I'm saying.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go scribble "SL + RK = TLF on a piece of paper until there is nothing but ink showing.
xosmlxo
Monday, 9 May 2011
FOLLOW THE LEADER!
Leyzertonians,
Aren't you glad that's over with? Phew! We don't have to sit through ANOTHER game 7 like we did last series! Man oh man am I ever relieved!
The boys played, as the picture above says, a little "follow the leader" all series, and that "leader" was not in fact a cute little blonde girl in a red dress, but a gritty American fellow that is done turning heads in Vancouver, we come to expect the effort each night, and has moved on to turning heads continent-wide. The legend of Ryan Kesler is growing. And growing. And growing.
My pals and I just laughed everytime he touched the puck. It was comical how he'd just bear down on a pair of Predators defenseman like they were me playing in the bushleagues of Northern Manitoba, only he was too quick to get away before the bushleaguers could retaliate with a golf swing to the ankle or a cross-check to the lower back (where there's no padding) as I would've done.
I've been trying to figure out what kind of drugs Kesler is on since game 7 of the last series against some team that is but a distant memory now. Well, Leyzerites, I know what it is. He's on Human Spirit. Apparently that's all it takes to be great in the world. Just a little belief in yourself, and a little focus, and a little hardwork. He's using every bit of it he has to win every battle and it's gotta be inspiring a few people in the world that are watching the games. I'm sure, all the while, he spends what little time he has off the ice with his wife and kids too. Keep in mind he's only 26 years old.
Guys got his shit together, eh?
Quick shout-out to my girlfriend, Carrie Underwood. You know Big Daddy doesn't like to see you cry like that, Babe. wipe those tears with your yellow towel. Text me later.
The twins are still playing like a "freak on a leash". Glad to see them get on the scoresheet tonight, and you know what? I think that's okay. I'll take a point a game from hereon out. Why the hell not? We can score by committee. and IF...IF San Jose wins, I think it'll benefit us greatly to play a more wide-open game. Then the Sedins and Burrows (where'd he go as this series went along, by the way?) can really shine.
I thought our bottom 6 guys played really well tonight, too. They assumed their role, and with the exception of one shift where they struggled to get it out of our zone, they did what was asked of them.
Thank GOD ALMIGHTY! Mason Raymond scored!!!!! Pretty goal, too. Kesler grinds it out, never gives up, gets it in front to Raymond, with some pretty sick dangles in tight. Gotta love to see the "other guy" on that second line getting a tally tonight.
The boys get a nice long break now. I'm kind of looking forward to it, and I can't see it hurting them one bit. Rest, time with the families, time to prepare for what's ahead. They don't have a tonne of momentum in their favour, so there probably won't be much of a crash from this series. Just a quick break, and business as usual.
Goodnight, All. Enjoy the streets tonight. I won't as I'll be up before 5 in the morning. Enjoy for me.
xosmlxo
Aren't you glad that's over with? Phew! We don't have to sit through ANOTHER game 7 like we did last series! Man oh man am I ever relieved!
The boys played, as the picture above says, a little "follow the leader" all series, and that "leader" was not in fact a cute little blonde girl in a red dress, but a gritty American fellow that is done turning heads in Vancouver, we come to expect the effort each night, and has moved on to turning heads continent-wide. The legend of Ryan Kesler is growing. And growing. And growing.
My pals and I just laughed everytime he touched the puck. It was comical how he'd just bear down on a pair of Predators defenseman like they were me playing in the bushleagues of Northern Manitoba, only he was too quick to get away before the bushleaguers could retaliate with a golf swing to the ankle or a cross-check to the lower back (where there's no padding) as I would've done.
I've been trying to figure out what kind of drugs Kesler is on since game 7 of the last series against some team that is but a distant memory now. Well, Leyzerites, I know what it is. He's on Human Spirit. Apparently that's all it takes to be great in the world. Just a little belief in yourself, and a little focus, and a little hardwork. He's using every bit of it he has to win every battle and it's gotta be inspiring a few people in the world that are watching the games. I'm sure, all the while, he spends what little time he has off the ice with his wife and kids too. Keep in mind he's only 26 years old.
Guys got his shit together, eh?
Quick shout-out to my girlfriend, Carrie Underwood. You know Big Daddy doesn't like to see you cry like that, Babe. wipe those tears with your yellow towel. Text me later.
The twins are still playing like a "freak on a leash". Glad to see them get on the scoresheet tonight, and you know what? I think that's okay. I'll take a point a game from hereon out. Why the hell not? We can score by committee. and IF...IF San Jose wins, I think it'll benefit us greatly to play a more wide-open game. Then the Sedins and Burrows (where'd he go as this series went along, by the way?) can really shine.
I thought our bottom 6 guys played really well tonight, too. They assumed their role, and with the exception of one shift where they struggled to get it out of our zone, they did what was asked of them.
Thank GOD ALMIGHTY! Mason Raymond scored!!!!! Pretty goal, too. Kesler grinds it out, never gives up, gets it in front to Raymond, with some pretty sick dangles in tight. Gotta love to see the "other guy" on that second line getting a tally tonight.
The boys get a nice long break now. I'm kind of looking forward to it, and I can't see it hurting them one bit. Rest, time with the families, time to prepare for what's ahead. They don't have a tonne of momentum in their favour, so there probably won't be much of a crash from this series. Just a quick break, and business as usual.
Goodnight, All. Enjoy the streets tonight. I won't as I'll be up before 5 in the morning. Enjoy for me.
xosmlxo
Sunday, 8 May 2011
Happy Red Wings Day
Hello all,
Today is a very special day. It is a day where Canucks fans can breathe a little easier, and feel a bit better because at least the Sharks can't close out a series either!
It is also special because I played golf with a guy that got a hole-in-one today. I'll never see that again, I'm sure.
It's also mother's day, more on that later.
Are you thinking the same thing I'm thinking? I think one of the 2 remaining series is gonna be a comeback for the ages. I just have a feeling. The second round needs a bit of that drama that was in the first round. It's creeping up on Sharks and Canucks fans, and Wings fans must really be believing in their boys. Fuck off, Predators fans.
We'll find out this coming week.
Better close it out tomorrow, Vancouver. Better help Kesler. Better see Nicole Kidman at the game again, and Keith Urban better not eat like a pig. The time for saying, as I've been saying, that the Sedin's are gonna break out any game now, is so last week. It's a new week, now. Make some new headlines, Twins.
I hope the lotta ya called up your mama's today, or if you live near them, you went and had a visit with them. I'm a pretty expressive guy, and can usually find the words to explain something, but I can't articulate how much my mother means to me. Much too complex in its simplicity. Too difficult in its ease.
Having a good relationship with my mother is one of the things in life that I am most grateful for. Seriously, it's very very near the top of the mountain. It's fully in the snow peak area. It's a big mountain.
I hope you all have at least experienced realizing that your mom is in fact very wise, very smart, very strong, and very funny, as I have over the years.
I hope you all have mad love for you mom, as I do.
I hope you love all the mom's you know, and give them as much respect as they deserve (LOTS). I can't imagine how scary, difficult, heartbreaking, sleepless, proud, happy and lovely the experience of being a mother would be. Hell, I can barely imagine being a father and I'm genetically built for it! Must be quite a ride, though.
Happy Mothers Day!
Less sap, more puck tomorrow.
xosmlxo
Today is a very special day. It is a day where Canucks fans can breathe a little easier, and feel a bit better because at least the Sharks can't close out a series either!
It is also special because I played golf with a guy that got a hole-in-one today. I'll never see that again, I'm sure.
It's also mother's day, more on that later.
Are you thinking the same thing I'm thinking? I think one of the 2 remaining series is gonna be a comeback for the ages. I just have a feeling. The second round needs a bit of that drama that was in the first round. It's creeping up on Sharks and Canucks fans, and Wings fans must really be believing in their boys. Fuck off, Predators fans.
We'll find out this coming week.
Better close it out tomorrow, Vancouver. Better help Kesler. Better see Nicole Kidman at the game again, and Keith Urban better not eat like a pig. The time for saying, as I've been saying, that the Sedin's are gonna break out any game now, is so last week. It's a new week, now. Make some new headlines, Twins.
I hope the lotta ya called up your mama's today, or if you live near them, you went and had a visit with them. I'm a pretty expressive guy, and can usually find the words to explain something, but I can't articulate how much my mother means to me. Much too complex in its simplicity. Too difficult in its ease.
Having a good relationship with my mother is one of the things in life that I am most grateful for. Seriously, it's very very near the top of the mountain. It's fully in the snow peak area. It's a big mountain.
I hope you all have at least experienced realizing that your mom is in fact very wise, very smart, very strong, and very funny, as I have over the years.
I hope you all have mad love for you mom, as I do.
I hope you love all the mom's you know, and give them as much respect as they deserve (LOTS). I can't imagine how scary, difficult, heartbreaking, sleepless, proud, happy and lovely the experience of being a mother would be. Hell, I can barely imagine being a father and I'm genetically built for it! Must be quite a ride, though.
Happy Mothers Day!
Less sap, more puck tomorrow.
xosmlxo
Saturday, 7 May 2011
from the beautiful cityscape of Canada's most beautiful city...
to a sinking ship. So the fuck what? Sue me, I'm a Canucks fan. I lack faith.
You know, a guy gets all dolled-up, combs his playoff beard, sprays his smelly shirt with axe deodorant bodyspray, and expects to be running through the streets with Crazies all night. That was my plan. I EXPECTED a victory tonight. The Canucks were in total control of the series, People!!! Now, we just let the team back in. Now it's a best of 3, and they have to fly ALLLLL the way to Nashville to try and close this thing out. It's stupid, yet dramatic. Always making us sweat, eh boys?
Henrik was minus 3 tonight. On the goal that Ward scored off a one-timer, I saw a Sedin gliding towards him. No effort on the backcheck. I'm sick of their pretty play. They obviously are not built to win in the National Hockey League playoffs, when the checking gets tighter and everyone's SUPPOSED to be playing like it's the last game they'll ever play. Maybe on a huge Swedish ice surface they'd be fine, stretch-passing all over the place, dangling around in the corners, but man oh man. There are really only 2 ways to score in the playoffs: shots from the point that a) the goalie cant see or b) that gets deflected past the seeing goalie, OR you score down low near the crease where you gotta be TOUGH!!!1TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUGGGGGGGGGGGGH! You gotta be able to handle a beast like Weber, or Suter or even a big ape like O' Brien beating you down in front and still have the sense to get your stick on the puck and jam it home. I think we've seen enough of Daniel and Henrik to know now, that FOR SURE, they don't have this quality. the flash and dash and beauty of their game is no good in the playoffs. this ain't a work of art, People, it's a fucking battle where people bleed to win. People like Ryan Kesler.
Mark Messier Jr.
But Messier had all those great Oilers helping him win when it was his Oilers team in 1990, and he had Brian Leetch, Stephan Matteau, Alex Kovalev, Mike Richter, Kevin Lowe, Craig Mac-T McTavish, Brian "NOOONAN" Noonan, and Esa Tikkanen helping him out in 1994. Ryan has gotten a bit of help from some guys, but nothing consistent. It'd be a shame for Ryan Kesler to not get to lift the cup this year. If anything, the boys should be stepping up to SOMEWHERE near his level to do it for him. 1 guys back is only so strong.
Luongo was shakey tonight, again.
Joel Ward will DEFINITELY be in my dreams tonight, playing cards with Dustin Byfuglien and laughing at our city.
Our weak links were exposed HEAVILY tonight. Rome and Hodgson gotta go. Done for the playoffs.
Good riddance, Samuelsson, call someone up that isn't hurt and isn't old and isn't slow.
Somebody better be a hero on Monday night, and he better have on a white uniform, and for the sake of their careers and reputations, they better have red hair, weird veins on their temples, and no facial hair on their cheeks. and talk in a monotone swedish accent.
:(
xosmlxo
You know, a guy gets all dolled-up, combs his playoff beard, sprays his smelly shirt with axe deodorant bodyspray, and expects to be running through the streets with Crazies all night. That was my plan. I EXPECTED a victory tonight. The Canucks were in total control of the series, People!!! Now, we just let the team back in. Now it's a best of 3, and they have to fly ALLLLL the way to Nashville to try and close this thing out. It's stupid, yet dramatic. Always making us sweat, eh boys?
Henrik was minus 3 tonight. On the goal that Ward scored off a one-timer, I saw a Sedin gliding towards him. No effort on the backcheck. I'm sick of their pretty play. They obviously are not built to win in the National Hockey League playoffs, when the checking gets tighter and everyone's SUPPOSED to be playing like it's the last game they'll ever play. Maybe on a huge Swedish ice surface they'd be fine, stretch-passing all over the place, dangling around in the corners, but man oh man. There are really only 2 ways to score in the playoffs: shots from the point that a) the goalie cant see or b) that gets deflected past the seeing goalie, OR you score down low near the crease where you gotta be TOUGH!!!1TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUGGGGGGGGGGGGH! You gotta be able to handle a beast like Weber, or Suter or even a big ape like O' Brien beating you down in front and still have the sense to get your stick on the puck and jam it home. I think we've seen enough of Daniel and Henrik to know now, that FOR SURE, they don't have this quality. the flash and dash and beauty of their game is no good in the playoffs. this ain't a work of art, People, it's a fucking battle where people bleed to win. People like Ryan Kesler.
Mark Messier Jr.
But Messier had all those great Oilers helping him win when it was his Oilers team in 1990, and he had Brian Leetch, Stephan Matteau, Alex Kovalev, Mike Richter, Kevin Lowe, Craig Mac-T McTavish, Brian "NOOONAN" Noonan, and Esa Tikkanen helping him out in 1994. Ryan has gotten a bit of help from some guys, but nothing consistent. It'd be a shame for Ryan Kesler to not get to lift the cup this year. If anything, the boys should be stepping up to SOMEWHERE near his level to do it for him. 1 guys back is only so strong.
Luongo was shakey tonight, again.
Joel Ward will DEFINITELY be in my dreams tonight, playing cards with Dustin Byfuglien and laughing at our city.
Our weak links were exposed HEAVILY tonight. Rome and Hodgson gotta go. Done for the playoffs.
Good riddance, Samuelsson, call someone up that isn't hurt and isn't old and isn't slow.
Somebody better be a hero on Monday night, and he better have on a white uniform, and for the sake of their careers and reputations, they better have red hair, weird veins on their temples, and no facial hair on their cheeks. and talk in a monotone swedish accent.
:(
xosmlxo
Thursday, 5 May 2011
Welcome home, Boys.
Leyzerites,
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Well how 'bout that?!
I mentioned yesterday about how strong I thought Tampa was. I also talked briefly about Boston and San Jose. Well, Vancouver just joined the group tonight! the MENSA of hockey teams.
It poses an awfully big problem for all of you degenerate gamblers out there, though. I mean, WHO DO YOU PICK TO MOVE ON!!!???Out of Boston, Tampa, San Jose and Vancouver, who has the upper hand? Fucked if I know. Seems like everything is working now. All the little things we as Canuck fans wanted to see done tonight, got done! Fans of those other 3 teams are saying the same thing. I'm contemplating not even making predictions for the next 2 rounds, because it's just too close to call.
(keep in mind that I'm aware that Nashville and Detroit and Philly are still, TECHNICALLY, alive and kicking. technically. But come on. Really? If Nashville comes back and wins this series, I'll have to have heart surgery. It just can't happen. If I don't believe it'll happen, it won't. And frankly, I could give a fuck about Philly and Detroit because they've played like they don't deserve to be in the final four, so kiss my grits).
The game though, eh? shiiiiiit. What a beauty! Idunno, pick your favourite part of the game - there were so many!!! Hank getting off the Schneid! Gotta love that. I called for our offensive-minded defensemen to step up tonight, and look what happened, People! They did just that. They answered Leyzer's bell like good little athletes.
There was some rough stuff in front of the net for all you bloodthirsty fans that lack knowledge and have an abundance of murderous rage (I know you're out there...fucking weirdos), albeit most of the nastiness came from Nashville, but lets face it, if they have one thing on us it's goaltend--shit, it's toughness. Like, brute toughness. We're tough the way an Alaskan Crab fisherman is tough, and they're more like Tank Abbott tough.
I think my favourite part of the game was hearing Grapes say AN AMERICAN was the Conn Smythe leader so far these playoffs! Amazing. I thought for sure he'd go St. Louis, mind you he's a Quebecker, so maybe not...but anyways, yaaa...He thinks Kesler should win Conn Smythe. I guess now that he's scoring, he's kind of put the final little notch in his Conn Smythe belt, because besides his no-show on the scoresheet, ya. Grapes is right. He is the most valuable player in the playoffs so far. He wants "it" more than anyone. It's true, and it's a bit scary for the rest of the NHL.
Well, I just feel a bit relieved tonight, don't you? like maybe game 5 can be a big rockin, city-wide party and we can just celebrate this round instead of going on stress leave from work (I didn't, but it sure as fuck crossed my mind). We're up 3-1 in the series, and we can move on as early as Saturday. WE BETTER DO IT SATURDAY! All these other teams have a chance to be done and moved on by the weekend, and Vancouvers gotta join them if we wanna rest up! they can't afford another long trip to Nashville. Get it DONE on saturday!
It was just an empty-netter, Hank. Hopefully it's a slump-buster cuz we, the fans, are gonna need ya to pot a few more if we wanna let our playoff bushes grow another month. Keep pluggin away.
Going to bed, it's late! I will dream pleasant dreams tonight. Relieving ones. ahhhhhhhh.
xosmlxo
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Well how 'bout that?!
I mentioned yesterday about how strong I thought Tampa was. I also talked briefly about Boston and San Jose. Well, Vancouver just joined the group tonight! the MENSA of hockey teams.
It poses an awfully big problem for all of you degenerate gamblers out there, though. I mean, WHO DO YOU PICK TO MOVE ON!!!???Out of Boston, Tampa, San Jose and Vancouver, who has the upper hand? Fucked if I know. Seems like everything is working now. All the little things we as Canuck fans wanted to see done tonight, got done! Fans of those other 3 teams are saying the same thing. I'm contemplating not even making predictions for the next 2 rounds, because it's just too close to call.
(keep in mind that I'm aware that Nashville and Detroit and Philly are still, TECHNICALLY, alive and kicking. technically. But come on. Really? If Nashville comes back and wins this series, I'll have to have heart surgery. It just can't happen. If I don't believe it'll happen, it won't. And frankly, I could give a fuck about Philly and Detroit because they've played like they don't deserve to be in the final four, so kiss my grits).
The game though, eh? shiiiiiit. What a beauty! Idunno, pick your favourite part of the game - there were so many!!! Hank getting off the Schneid! Gotta love that. I called for our offensive-minded defensemen to step up tonight, and look what happened, People! They did just that. They answered Leyzer's bell like good little athletes.
There was some rough stuff in front of the net for all you bloodthirsty fans that lack knowledge and have an abundance of murderous rage (I know you're out there...fucking weirdos), albeit most of the nastiness came from Nashville, but lets face it, if they have one thing on us it's goaltend--shit, it's toughness. Like, brute toughness. We're tough the way an Alaskan Crab fisherman is tough, and they're more like Tank Abbott tough.
I think my favourite part of the game was hearing Grapes say AN AMERICAN was the Conn Smythe leader so far these playoffs! Amazing. I thought for sure he'd go St. Louis, mind you he's a Quebecker, so maybe not...but anyways, yaaa...He thinks Kesler should win Conn Smythe. I guess now that he's scoring, he's kind of put the final little notch in his Conn Smythe belt, because besides his no-show on the scoresheet, ya. Grapes is right. He is the most valuable player in the playoffs so far. He wants "it" more than anyone. It's true, and it's a bit scary for the rest of the NHL.
Well, I just feel a bit relieved tonight, don't you? like maybe game 5 can be a big rockin, city-wide party and we can just celebrate this round instead of going on stress leave from work (I didn't, but it sure as fuck crossed my mind). We're up 3-1 in the series, and we can move on as early as Saturday. WE BETTER DO IT SATURDAY! All these other teams have a chance to be done and moved on by the weekend, and Vancouvers gotta join them if we wanna rest up! they can't afford another long trip to Nashville. Get it DONE on saturday!
It was just an empty-netter, Hank. Hopefully it's a slump-buster cuz we, the fans, are gonna need ya to pot a few more if we wanna let our playoff bushes grow another month. Keep pluggin away.
Going to bed, it's late! I will dream pleasant dreams tonight. Relieving ones. ahhhhhhhh.
xosmlxo
Wednesday, 4 May 2011
My Apologies.
Hello Love,
Taking that picture of Carrie Underwood off my blog was the hardest thing I have ever done on this blog. It was my bravest move to date. I received a tonne of feedback about those legs, my incredible taste in women, and my incredible ability to arouse my leagues and leagues of followers with one simple jpeg!
The new picture, though...Just sayin. It could happen. Tampa just looks unstoppable. 7 straight wins! How is this happening?! How is Sean Bergenheim lighting it up out there?! What kind of accent does he have??!! His name is Sean for fuck sakes! It's the Sean Bergenheim's of the playoffs that make them interesting. Remember Fernando Pisani for the Oilers the last time they made their run? Guy was clutch like Stu "Clutch" Barnes himself.
There ain't a kink in Tampa's armour. I suppose we all shouldn't be too surprised, as the overall standings are always pretty close 1 through 8 when the big dance starts. I guess the only questions about them were...well...there were a lot of questions. Will their big guns step up? They have (could see more outta Stevey Stamkos, though. A little more clutch.) Will Dwayne Roloson live to see the end of the playoffs? All signs point to yes he will. He'll live like there's no tomorrow! How bout their D? Are they battle tested enough to make a run? Well, no, but who the fuck cares! they're playing great. You gotta love the Hedman kid. He takes up a tonne of space out there, smart with the puck, physical, and I don't even think he's legal in the states. Will they have the depth to go deep? ummm...can you say SEAN BERGENHEIM, STEVE DOWNIE AND DOMINIC MOORE!? If you can't, spit the shit out of your mouth and scream it to the mountaintops! These muhfuckas are as real and mysterious as Guy Boucher's scar.
And Washington....what to do, what to do? Can't really blow up the team, but they've been ousted in the playoffs early for 4 straight years. A lower-seeded team has sent them to the golf course 4 straight years. That's not good. I think, as entertaining as the guy is and as round as his belly is, I think Bruce Budreau will be out of a job and possibly taking gigs as Santa Claus next Christmas. They have to change something, and no one, AND THE ROCK MEANS NO ONE is gonna wanna eat up Nick Backstrom's contract. Mike Green's concussed, that's excusable. Ovechkin has nothing to be ashamed of. I can't believe they called that penalty on him. It's so inconsistent, those charging calls. It's like they just call every second one that happens, regardless of who's doing it, or what time in the game it is. Ovi will win some time. Just not with this team, changes are in order. He needs some sack around him. Semin is a bum, too. A Kovalev. A Kovalchuk.
And whatdya say about Philly? I said it already in previous blog, so I'm not gonna repeat myself. But, I did tell a pal today that they could LITERALLY trade any one of their top-tier forwards for Corey Schneider in the off-season and be a better team. They'll still be a top-tier team without Claude Giroux. Without James van Riemsdyk. Someone like that. It'll never happen, but it should.
Boston scored a powerplay goal. Much like Kesler getting on the board last night....look out, people.
There is nothing I like more than seeing Dany "fuckin" Heatley getting destroyed by Nick Kronwall. Nothing. I could watch that for days, however, my eyes are sore from exposure to dust, so I can't watch it. I need to sit in a dark room and stubbornly avoid doctor's attention to the damage that has been done to my eyes, rather than ENJOYING MYSELF! FUCK!!
Do you not believe that if ANYONE can come back from an 0-3 deficit, it's Detroit? just a little bit? against famous choke artists San Jose? hey? a bit?
Or has San Jose FINALLY just learned how to win a cup?
At least the game went into overtime, and Detroit made you believe they might actually crawl out of the hole. I'd like to say it's over, but I won't till I see the handshakes.
Ugh, Kate Bierness is calling me to watch her on Sportscentre. I guess I'll wear sunglasses. Hey, Ray Charles got a lot of ass, didn't he?
Maybe I won't watch, I'm feeling a bit like I am entering a cross-roads in my life here, so maybe it is time for some meditation instead of oggling a sports reporter. ahhh...but it's the playoffs!!!!??? I'm so torn. Looking inside for answers, or oggggling?!? Man's Greatest Struggle!!!! Let the universe show me the way.
peace friends.
xosmlxo
Taking that picture of Carrie Underwood off my blog was the hardest thing I have ever done on this blog. It was my bravest move to date. I received a tonne of feedback about those legs, my incredible taste in women, and my incredible ability to arouse my leagues and leagues of followers with one simple jpeg!
The new picture, though...Just sayin. It could happen. Tampa just looks unstoppable. 7 straight wins! How is this happening?! How is Sean Bergenheim lighting it up out there?! What kind of accent does he have??!! His name is Sean for fuck sakes! It's the Sean Bergenheim's of the playoffs that make them interesting. Remember Fernando Pisani for the Oilers the last time they made their run? Guy was clutch like Stu "Clutch" Barnes himself.
There ain't a kink in Tampa's armour. I suppose we all shouldn't be too surprised, as the overall standings are always pretty close 1 through 8 when the big dance starts. I guess the only questions about them were...well...there were a lot of questions. Will their big guns step up? They have (could see more outta Stevey Stamkos, though. A little more clutch.) Will Dwayne Roloson live to see the end of the playoffs? All signs point to yes he will. He'll live like there's no tomorrow! How bout their D? Are they battle tested enough to make a run? Well, no, but who the fuck cares! they're playing great. You gotta love the Hedman kid. He takes up a tonne of space out there, smart with the puck, physical, and I don't even think he's legal in the states. Will they have the depth to go deep? ummm...can you say SEAN BERGENHEIM, STEVE DOWNIE AND DOMINIC MOORE!? If you can't, spit the shit out of your mouth and scream it to the mountaintops! These muhfuckas are as real and mysterious as Guy Boucher's scar.
And Washington....what to do, what to do? Can't really blow up the team, but they've been ousted in the playoffs early for 4 straight years. A lower-seeded team has sent them to the golf course 4 straight years. That's not good. I think, as entertaining as the guy is and as round as his belly is, I think Bruce Budreau will be out of a job and possibly taking gigs as Santa Claus next Christmas. They have to change something, and no one, AND THE ROCK MEANS NO ONE is gonna wanna eat up Nick Backstrom's contract. Mike Green's concussed, that's excusable. Ovechkin has nothing to be ashamed of. I can't believe they called that penalty on him. It's so inconsistent, those charging calls. It's like they just call every second one that happens, regardless of who's doing it, or what time in the game it is. Ovi will win some time. Just not with this team, changes are in order. He needs some sack around him. Semin is a bum, too. A Kovalev. A Kovalchuk.
And whatdya say about Philly? I said it already in previous blog, so I'm not gonna repeat myself. But, I did tell a pal today that they could LITERALLY trade any one of their top-tier forwards for Corey Schneider in the off-season and be a better team. They'll still be a top-tier team without Claude Giroux. Without James van Riemsdyk. Someone like that. It'll never happen, but it should.
Boston scored a powerplay goal. Much like Kesler getting on the board last night....look out, people.
There is nothing I like more than seeing Dany "fuckin" Heatley getting destroyed by Nick Kronwall. Nothing. I could watch that for days, however, my eyes are sore from exposure to dust, so I can't watch it. I need to sit in a dark room and stubbornly avoid doctor's attention to the damage that has been done to my eyes, rather than ENJOYING MYSELF! FUCK!!
Do you not believe that if ANYONE can come back from an 0-3 deficit, it's Detroit? just a little bit? against famous choke artists San Jose? hey? a bit?
Or has San Jose FINALLY just learned how to win a cup?
At least the game went into overtime, and Detroit made you believe they might actually crawl out of the hole. I'd like to say it's over, but I won't till I see the handshakes.
Ugh, Kate Bierness is calling me to watch her on Sportscentre. I guess I'll wear sunglasses. Hey, Ray Charles got a lot of ass, didn't he?
Maybe I won't watch, I'm feeling a bit like I am entering a cross-roads in my life here, so maybe it is time for some meditation instead of oggling a sports reporter. ahhh...but it's the playoffs!!!!??? I'm so torn. Looking inside for answers, or oggggling?!? Man's Greatest Struggle!!!! Let the universe show me the way.
peace friends.
xosmlxo
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