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HUH!? WHAT!? oh God, I'm so sorry, I totally just dozed off and almost forgot to write this blog. I'll do the blog, though, don't worry. Just gimme a sec here to sorta snap out of it.

Okay. Good. Thanks for your patience. I thought the Canucks played pretty poorly tonight. The puck was bouncing all over the place, their passes seemed a few inches off almost all the time, and the game just lacked emotion. I guess, if I'm comparing it to the heart-attackfest that was 2 nights ago, there was 0 emotion, but for a regular game, there was still very little umpph to the game. It was just a strange game with no flow. Really weird. Even the goal was weird. Nice shot by Higgins, but mass confusion after he went bar-down. By that point, I was so sunken into my seat with boredom that I didn't even scream. No fistpumps. No looks to the heavens (as if God is blessing ME with a Canucks goal, that's a funny thought. Read Andre Agassi's book. I'm like Michael Chang). There was a CLIPPING  penalty in the game. That was weird, and also probably the most exciting part of the game. Seriously, how can you call that when the guy he hit is 5'8" and 290lbs of pure Inuk brute force? It's pretty much impossible to get low enough to clip him....but, remember what I said in a previous blog, never listen to me when I say the word "pretty much"...
Lucky for all of us here in the Lower Mainland and for all of Canucks Nation (that exists now, didn't you know?), we got away with one. That's the wrong term to use, because it's not like we were outplayed. We just were given a "gimme", as they say in drunken-or-amateur-or-definitely-both golfing. We didn't show up today, but we're up 1-0. Fuck it, I'll take what I can get, and I'm sure if you're a Canucks fan you will too.
Nashville was AWFUL tonight. Not quite as bad as the Canucks in games 4 and 5 of last series (forever the "measuring stick" of poor playoff performances for the remainder of time), but just lifeless. I think they, like us, have to really take some time tomorrow and get their heads into the series. Start playing with a purpose again. The last round is over, and now there's a new story to write. I hope Grapes was right when he said the next game will be 10 times better and more intense.
Speaking of Grapes, I thought he was probably the most entertaining piece of the broadcast tonight. How the fuck did he pick all 3 of Boston's overtime heroes?! who does that!!?? Seriously, in all my years of watching playoff hockey, I always pick a guy from each team to score in overtime, and I don't think I've ever been right. He goes 3 for 3 in a series. There's something not human about that old timer, and boy oh boy I tell ya, ya gotta love Grapes! O. Kay! Who do we got next here ohhh right Dougie Gilmour, my buddy, Kingston Ontario....Okay, Leyzer: Grapes impression only good when spoken to a crowd of hockey fans. The written word doesn't do it justice.
Our moods from the game were similar tonight, me and him. I caught myself laughing at just how BORING it was, and he was cracking jokes left, right and centre about guys falling asleep. Let's face it, Canucks fans, we got spoiled this week....We're not gonna top that this year, unless...well you know.
I do think that you're gonna see a goalie duel this series. I think Luongo is really loose now, and a loose Lui isn't something to fuck with. Even if a soft one goes in on him, I think he bounces back. He won me over after game 7.
I'm still waiting, Hank and Danny.....cam annnnnn...when are you two nice men gonna get mean and start embarrassing the other team??? Hank showed a little flash and dash and ooh and awe tonight, so maybe it'll be Saturday when they arrive.
Man! seriously, that game  SUCKKKKKED. Yikes. What else happened? OH YA! hhaha.
couple things not hockey related:
1. Okay, does Frank D'Angelo or whatever the fuck his name is make your skin crawl, too? That dude is all kinds of scary-looking. I hate him, and I don't even know who he is! Is he endorsing a line of motorcycles or energy drinks? What is that?!! ugh, I don't even want to keep talking about him because his devilish grin and centre-part in his hair are going to make me lose sleep tonight. and DON'T wish me good luck, Frank, okay? I don't need luck, and I don't believe in luck. Seriously, I don't. No such thing, in my opinion. But I certainly don't need some random dude who's important enough to attach his full name to an ad about something to wish anything for me. Fuck Frank D'Angelo and the horse he rode in on.
2. That ad for The Keg that they play on Hockey Night in Canada is strange as fuck too. What's with all the lady-teeth? That's all I see in that commercial. Funny thing is, I have this thing where I'm attracted to women with big teeth (note: teenage girl-on-Justin Beiberesque love affair with Jennifer Heil and also a brief stint as a child of wanting to do something sexual with Nancy Kerrigan...don't think I knew what sex was when I was feeling what I was feeling, but I wanted something. Probably kisses), so you'd think I'd be into this ad. NOPE! I think its gross because the broad's in it all look like they're wearing dentures or something. They're not even hot in the first place, but there's bad lighting on their teeth that just make the screen blind me. No wonder I'm putting visine in my eyes everynight! they're burned!  Those chicks would have pink teeth from the belinis or whatever the fuck they're drinking anyways. probably some steak spice caught in their teeth, too. and one would smell like B.O.  I don't even know what's going on in the ad, I just see teeth and average-looking women disguised as hot, successful females. I like my women like I like my moguls skiiers, looking just like Jennifer Heil...ohhh yaaaaa.
Well, I'm hittin' the road tomorrow, bright n early, gotta pay the bills. It'll be nice to see the sunrise on the highway though. that's 1 for the Canucks, just three more to go. I'd say "good job, boys" or "fuckin eh rights, fellas", but I wouldn't be meaning it, so I won't. Pretty blahhh effort, but a win is a win is a win.
I will miss PK Subban until October. He's a treat. Drew Doughty, too. same with Richardson and Clifford also from LA. Look forward to seeing Sid and Malkin back next year too. Pittsburgh might be a beast next year. I will also miss Nathan Gerbe and Tyler Ennis, the Buffalo Dwarves. Solid effort, boys. Oh, and I will miss when Cammalleri scores and is all business. Who can do that after they score a big goal like he did in game 6? I'd be headbutting the glass til I got sent to the quiet room.
Goodnight, Sexmachines.

xosmlxo